We're talking with the man known as DARKSEID, a powerful ruler on his homeworld of Apokalips, where he's coming to us via a remote hookup.
GGG: Darkseid? We've got you on picture and speaker now, Darkseid. We're ready to begin.
DARKSEID: Thank you for that introduction, human. I appreciate the courtesy you have extended to allow me to speak to you and your minions today.
One small thing though. Your pronunciation is slightly off. I am called Darkseid. The second syllable should sound like the human word ‘side’. But do not worry yourself too much. You will learn my name eventually. All will learn my name eventually. It is inevitable. But until then, you may address me as ‘Lord’ or ‘Master’ if you wish.
GGG [making an impressed face and thumbing at the screen as if to say, "whatta guy!"]: The Just Us League likes to paint you as a bloodthirsty despot in order to get the public to support their campaign against you. Tell us about yourself and your mission, in your own words.
DARKSEID: Look around you human. Everyday you see crime. You see violence. You see chaos. This is what life brings you: chaos. I have seen countless worlds, near infinite lifeforms, and all share a common trait. All life leads to chaos.
I offer an alternative to life. It has been my mission through the years to acquire knowledge of what is known as the Anti-Life Equation. When I find it, I will be unstoppable.
I am not a life creator. But I can be the one who brings order to chaos. Planets under my rule know no crime. They no no strife. They only know order. Order and the freedom of release to my iron will.
GGG: So what you're saying is that you value peace and order, and the letter of the law? Sounds kosher to me so far, right folks?
I get the idea that you’re a family man, Darkseid. Can you tell us more about your personal family values? Is this one of the reasons why the superzeroes hate you, because you support traditional families?
DARKSEID: I do not consider myself knowledgable enough of what Earthlings define as ‘traditional values’. And I do not pretend to know the motivations behind this organization’s reasons for their hatred of me.
On my home planet and in my service, I have many female in command positions. A woman named Granny Goodness is one of my top lieutenants. She commands legions. She also trains and commands an all-female force. They are my fiercest warriors. Many times I trust my most important commands and my personal safety to their care.
Perhaps this angers the beings you refer to as ‘super powered’. Perhaps your so-called ‘Justice League’ is simply misogynistic.
GGG: Wouldn't put it past them, considering the outfits those hussies wear. And with somebody called "Granny" in charge of your forces, Darkseid, I doubt you're running a costumed sex club like those Just Us Leaguers are!
Now, I support the Green Lantern Corps for protecting the Earth’s freedom, you know that. And just to show that GGG asks the hard questions and doesn't show favouritism, answer me this, Darkseid: how can you justify attacking these brave soldiers, when unlike the rest of the superzeroes, they’re looking out for truth and justice?
DARKSEID: My reasons are complex and varied. The leash masters of the Green Lantern Corps are far more ancient than even your planet, human. There was a time when the Guardians and I enjoyed an agreed upon truce.
They broke that truce.
But the simplest answer I can give as it could be understood by your tiny human intellect is this: They are in league with the League. They support the power structure that keeps your planet from the ultimate freedom that I could offer it. The Lanterns of space sector 2814 fight for the corrupt status quo your planet now suffers under.
I do not understand your support of their actions. You can see this clearly, right human?
GGG: Now that you've explained how the Guardians betrayed you, I sure can, Darkseid! It's my understanding that the Green Lanterns of Earth often buck the wills of the Guardians in order to protect Earth's interests and our rights and freedom, and that's why I support Guy Gardner, Hal Jordan, Kyle Rayner and John Stewart.
Which brings us to another point. Do you know the “secret identities” of any of these dangerous vigilantes on the Just Us League? Can you expose them?
DARKSEID: Secret Identities? What is that?
GGG: Unlike the brave Green Lanterns I just listed, most Earth superzeroes have a name that they use when they're hiding behind masks and capes. The rest of the time, they live an entirely different existence as regular people, blending in with the rest of us and deceiving everybody.
DARKSEID:
What a ridiculous concept! I did not think it possible, but I have lost what little respect I had for the so-called heroes of Earth. What a bunch of playacting jackasses!
Even if I do discover these secrets in the future, I will not share them with you. It pleases me to know that some would-be gods are forced - no choosing! - to masquerade as the very insignificant insects they should be ruling over!
[laughs again]
GGG: Erm, yes. Moving on. Is there any reason that Earth people should be more afraid of you than of, say, Superman or that Martian Manhunter? The Just Us League itself has members who could use their powers against us regular people at any moment!
DARKSEID: Yes.
GGG: Erm, yes. Moving on. Is there any reason that Earth people should be more afraid of you than of, say, Superman or that Martian Manhunter? The Just Us League itself has members who could use their powers against us regular people at any moment!
DARKSEID: Yes.
GGG: Care to elaborate?
DARKSEID: Not at this time.
GGG: All right then. I respect a man who knows when to keep his own counsel. So Darkseid, who do you think are the worst members of the Just Us League? You can interpret that however you want: most pitiful, most dangerous, most power mad, most degenerate.
DARKSEID: Humans that submit to the leadership of what you call ‘super powered’ individuals and join them in their deeds are worse than the ‘super powered’ individuals themselves. Most humans, present company excluded of course...
DARKSEID: Not at this time.
GGG: All right then. I respect a man who knows when to keep his own counsel. So Darkseid, who do you think are the worst members of the Just Us League? You can interpret that however you want: most pitiful, most dangerous, most power mad, most degenerate.
DARKSEID: Humans that submit to the leadership of what you call ‘super powered’ individuals and join them in their deeds are worse than the ‘super powered’ individuals themselves. Most humans, present company excluded of course...
GGG: Of course...
DARKSEID: Most of you are inconsequential maggots in the grand scheme of things. For example, if I were to wipe you from the plane of existence --
- how long would you be mourned? How long until the insects on your planet move their attention to the next shiny object?
GGG: I don’t think I take too kindly to threats from intergalactic despots half a universe away! What makes you think you can bully Gordon Godfrey? I do not bend to the words of terrorists! I stand with righteousness on my side! I have the support of --
DARKSEID: Do not trumpet at me, braying ass. All will submit to my iron will. All will be shaped in my image. All will die for Darkseid.
GGG [getting to his feet, slightly unnerved but rallying quickly]: There you have it, RIGHT THINKERS! You got to hear the story from Darkseid's own mouth, and not through the garbled propaganda of the Just Us League and any other superzero. It's up to YOU to choose whether or not Darkseid's no-nonsense approach to deploying troops and keeping order is better than a bunch of loose cannon vigilantes running around half dressed and corrupting your children.
And I know that you will all come to the right conclusions. After all, you're not watching GGG for nothing!
DARKSEID: Most of you are inconsequential maggots in the grand scheme of things. For example, if I were to wipe you from the plane of existence --
- how long would you be mourned? How long until the insects on your planet move their attention to the next shiny object?
GGG: I don’t think I take too kindly to threats from intergalactic despots half a universe away! What makes you think you can bully Gordon Godfrey? I do not bend to the words of terrorists! I stand with righteousness on my side! I have the support of --
[GGG looks startled as a small boom tube opens up behind him, thunderous and howling. On the screen, an identical small boom tube claps open in front of Darkseid as his eyes sizzle with red energy, and then...]
[The omega beams blast out of the boom tube behind GGG, obliterating his chair and dumping him unceremoniously to the ground as the tubes close up with a final howl and DARKSEID continues]
DARKSEID: Do not trumpet at me, braying ass. All will submit to my iron will. All will be shaped in my image. All will die for Darkseid.
[The screen blips into black]
GGG [getting to his feet, slightly unnerved but rallying quickly]: There you have it, RIGHT THINKERS! You got to hear the story from Darkseid's own mouth, and not through the garbled propaganda of the Just Us League and any other superzero. It's up to YOU to choose whether or not Darkseid's no-nonsense approach to deploying troops and keeping order is better than a bunch of loose cannon vigilantes running around half dressed and corrupting your children.
And I know that you will all come to the right conclusions. After all, you're not watching GGG for nothing!
Oh my god, Godfrey, do you realize what you just did?!?! Are you even still alive???
ReplyDeleteStill alive and kicking at injustice, Green Lantern Rayner! And all I did was provide a platform for some TRUTHS to be spoken. The American people deserve all the facts at their disposal to make up their own minds!
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